Yesteray I had scans - CT of chest, abdomen and pelvis. And bone scan. I was pretty worried this time as I've had some intermittent left hip pain over the last month or so. So it was a HUGE relief to hear that all is "stalble". That's a bit of a misnomer - it's stable, as in the cancer hasn't spread, but the Vix assures me that there is cancer throughout my pelvis. I didn't konw it was on my left side. But it is. So fine, OK. Whatever. It is still quite confusing, actually. She readily says that they are chasing shadows. Bone cancer isn't like a mass. It's diffuse. And she has described the skeletal system as an open channel. Cancer cells float all over the place and hopefully don't take up "residence".
I am so damned lucky It will be 14 years in August. Early on it was looking so dire. I remember asking her when we first met - what is the longest any of your patients have survived with my profile? she said 12 years. And I've certainly outpaced that! She is not going to investigate the hip pain - I am just to let her know if it worsens significantly. And in the meantime I continue on oral chemo - I've been on that for almost 2 years. People talk about their "forever-this-or-that". This is my forever drug. Until it's not. Communication with The Vix is confusing at times. When I first started the chemo, Glenn and I left the consult with the impression that I'd be on it for a few years. Next consult we asked about that again - she said, no, you will be on this indefinitely. I've had that experience with her many times - which is why I always go with someone to her appointments. To make sure I understand what she's telling me/us.
The only other comment I have today is that I somehow keep the cancer thing super compartmentalized. Maybe that's a coping thing I learned young, living in my insane family. In my experience, I'm a cancer patient only when I am inside the Dana Farber. Otherwise I'm not. I don't think about it mucch, I don't talk about it much. It's better that way. I'd rather talk about a million other things I am not that diagnosis/progosis.
I was in Brookline all of last week - hoping see friends, play bluegrass with the Handsome Ladies, go to First Friday gallery openings. Most of that didn't happen because of the Omicron situation. It's absolutely everywhere. At this point I'm not sure why I'm trying to avoid it - it seems inevitable. We did a few "unsafe" things over the weekend and it felt wonderful! We had some friends over for dinner. Met another friend at a cafe. Went to see a few shows at the Museum of Fine Arts/Boston. And ate Thai for lunch yesterday to celebrate the good scans - inside! Living with cancer - living with Covid.
